Category Archives: Soul

How to Connect with Any Civilian You Meet

An Easy Way to Continue Your Legacy of Service

2 minutes to read

Parsha [Passage of Scripture] Nugget [Precious Idea] Tetzaveh - Exodus 27:20-30:10

Recently I flew on Alaska Airlines. It’s military friendly. You don’t pay baggage fees. Sometimes you can board with the first class passengers. And, you get the obligatory thanks for your service. The gate agent didn’t sound sincere. But, Parsha Tetzaveh explains why I accepted his thanks anyway:

“And you will command the Children of Israel and they will take for you olive oil, clear, crushed for illumination; to light a lamp continually.” (Shemos/Exodus 27:20).

How to Connect with Any Civilian You Meet

This Sabbath’s parsha begins by explaining the mitzvah of the Ner Tamid, the lamp that must always stay lit. Then it describes how to make and use the garments for the Kohen Gadol (High Priest) and the Kohanim. Next, it goes over the mitzvah of the korban tamid or continual offering. It ends with how to build and use the incense altar, the Holy of Holies.

G-d Let’s Us Pay Our Debt

G-d groups the Ner Tamid with other offerings. So the Almighty must intend it as an offering of light to Him. But why does the Creator need light, even at night?

In fact, G-d doesn’t need light. But think about a sighted person who helps a blind person get home. Even though the blind person doesn’t need light, the sighted person asks him to light a lamp. He says, “Please do this so you won’t have to feel indebted to me for what I have done for you. Now you have done me a favor.” The Creator gave us light. He could have let us feel indebted every minute of daylight. Instead, He asked us to provide eternal light for Him.

Like what you're reading? Sign up for my blog updates and never miss a post. I'll send you a FREE gift as a thank you. Click here to subscribe.

Unfortunately, sometimes people resent your doing something nice for them. They feel indebted or guilty. True kindness entails giving and receiving with no ulterior motive or expectation of anything in return. But rather than risk bad feelings, it’s better to let people “pay” you back.

Think Connect When a Civilian Thanks You

Some of the veterans I speak with resent civilians who thanks them for their service. They feel such words are insincere. They’d prefer people said nothing.

You may not have joined the military solely to serve. Educational or other benefits may have motivated you. There’s nothing wrong with that. Congress, on behalf of the American people, made them part of our compensation. Still, many of our fellow citizens feel a personal obligation toward veterans.

They know you did things they did not or could not do. Receiving a person’s gratitude allows him to discharge that debt. His words may not sound genuine to you. It would be better if a civilian said thanks in a way that sounded sincere. Even so, kindness requires accepting his appreciation.

Ideally, civilians should be content to let you serve for your personal reasons. They shouldn’t burden you with expressions of gratitude that don’t ring true. Allowing your fellow citizens to get rid of feeling indebted or guilty may make your transition harder. As a service member, you went the extra mile. Do it again. Connect with people in civilian life by accepting their thanks.

Question – Does it bother you when people thank you for your service?

You can leave a comment on this question or ask another question below

 

Every year beginning on Simchas Torah, the cycle of reading the Torah, the first five books of the Bible, ends and begins again. Each Sabbath a portion known as a sedra or parsha is read. Its name comes from the first significant word or two with which this weekly reading begins.

Do you have a question about the Old Testament? Ask it here and I will answer it in a future Parsha Nugget!

How to Break Through Your Barrier to a High-Paying Job

Is Fear Preventing You from Maximizing Your Value?

2-½ minutes to read

Parsha [Passage of Scripture] Nugget [Precious Idea] Terumah – Exodus 25:1-27:19

Many veterans have told me they don’t care about making a lot of money. They just want to get by. Does this describe your perspective on wealth? It has a sense of humility about it. But is it coming from a humble place? Or are you secretly afraid you don’t have what it takes to get a high-paying job? G-d’s interaction with Moses in Parshas Terumah shows how to break through to the path to service and success:

“Speak to the Children of Israel, and they will take for Me a portion…” (Shemos/Exodus 25:22)

How to Break Through Your Barrier to a High-Paying Job

This Sabbath’s parsha details the plans for the Mishkan or portable Sanctuary. G-d rested His Presence there during the Israelites’ wanderings in the wilderness. Such ordinary materials as copper, linen, and goatskins are turned into a holy abode.

You Can’t Give What Someone Else Owns

G-d uses a strange word when He commands Moses to ask the Israelites to donate the materials for building the Tabernacle. Usually, when contributing money to construct a building, donors say they gave money to build it. But you can’t give anything to G-d. All creation belongs to Him already.

So it makes no sense for the Almighty to tell the Israelites to give donations for the Tabernacle. But telling them to take donations makes no sense either. Only someone embezzling the donations would say he was taking them.

Like what you're reading? Sign up for my blog updates and never miss a post. I'll send you a FREE gift as a thank you. Click here to subscribe.

It turns out when the Almighty says, “take for Me” He means, “from what I have given you to use, separate a gift in my name.”

Break Through to Take Your Money With You

So you don’t actually own your money. It’s not a part of you. You only have use of it for your limited time in this world. As a result, some people decide to spend their money indiscriminately. Or, they use it to indulge in hedonistic pleasures. But because some people abuse wealth doesn’t mean you will. So don’t avoid maximizing the value of your skills, knowledge, and experience.

While you don’t own your wealth, the Almighty expects you to use it wisely. How?

The Tabernacle teaches money transforms into an eternal possession when you use it for a holy purpose. Support your family. Develop your resilience and character. Donate it to charity. Use the prosperity that the Almighty gives you toward His cherished goal. When you take care of His children, you improve the only thing you’ll take into eternity: Your relationships with G-d.

Like money, your skills, knowledge, and experiences all become worthless when you die. But you can use them to build value in other people’s lives. Then they become tools for building the eternal possession of a close relationship with the Creator.

When someone tells you service to others is the path to success, they’re describing this very idea. It’s built into military life. That’s why years ago people said you joined the service. You were a service member, not a military member.

Make service your goal in civilian life. Note that getting paid well doesn’t conflict with helping others. People need better goods and services. They need new ways of understanding the complexity of modern life. Use your skills, knowledge, and experience to better their lives. Break through the fear you can't or shouldn't have a high-paying job. Then you’ll have plenty of money to take for G-d as you build an eternal possession.

Question – How does it make you feel to give money to charity?

You can leave a comment on this question or ask another question below

 

Every year beginning on Simchas Torah, the cycle of reading the Torah, the first five books of the Bible, ends and begins again. Each Sabbath a portion known as a sedra or parsha is read. It is named after the first significant word or two with which this weekly reading begins.

Do you have a question about the Old Testament? Ask it here and I will answer it in a future Parsha Nugget!

How to Unlock Hope When You Need It Most

The Value Focus Will Add to Your Job-Hunt

2-½ minutes to read

Parsha [Passage of Scripture] Nugget [Precious Idea] Mishpatim - Exodus 21:1-24:18

Let’s face it, life can be discouraging. Sometimes you lose heart. Your job-hunt has lasted too long. Or your marriage has deteriorated so that you feel disconnected from your spouse. Whatever plagues you, anger and disappointment scatter your thinking. If only you could unlock hope when you need it. Then you could proceed with confidence. Right? Parshas Mishpatim has the answer:

“…and he heals he will heal.” (Shemos/Exodus 21:19).

How to Unlock Hope When You Need It Most

In this Sabbath's parsha, G-d gives 53 mitzvahs to guide the conduct of the Israelites. Twenty-three are positive things they can do to get closer to G-d. Thirty are negative things that will damage their relationship with Him. The mitzvahs cover a broad range of institutions, crimes, activities, and celebrations. Toward the end of Mishpatim, G-d promises to lead the Children of Israel into the Land of Israel and conquer their enemies.

Find a Partner in Your Struggles

Bob and Jim get into a fight. Bob hits Jim with a stone or his fist. He hurts him doesn’t kill him. Bob pays Jim for lost wages and medical expenses. All this is normal. Then the Torah says someone will heal Jim and repeats he will heal him. We already know Jim didn’t die. So of course he got better.

Still, the Torah says twice that he’ll be healed. The repetition appears to have no purpose.

The first “He heals” might be interpreted as “G-d heals.” Perhaps you must rely ONLY on the Almighty if you are sick or injured. But if the first “he heals” refers to G-d, the second one must allude to someone else. The Talmud says the doctor is the second “he heals.” So healing comes from a partnership between G-d and a doctor.

The verse also teaches doctors heal, but they don’t control whether a patient recovers. The pairing of G-d and a human healer means no matter how great the physician, the Almighty makes the final decision. As partners, the doctor uses his knowledge, skill, and experience toward a goal. G-d decides the results.

Like what you're reading? Sign up for my blog updates and never miss a post. I'll send you a FREE gift as a thank you. Click here to subscribe.

The Almighty has the same partnership with you.

Unlock Hope on Demand

Good doctors know even with the best treatment, some patients die. They don’t control the outcome. Despite this reality, they go to extraordinary lengths to ensure their patients live. At the same time, most doctors compartmentalize disappointment. They shield themselves from the unpredictable aspects of their work. So they can always unlock hope.

You can follow this model. Rather than judging your success based on the outcome, focus on the process. Go to extraordinary lengths in carrying out each step of your job-hunt. Use your knowledge, skills, and experience toward a goal. Leave the result to the Almighty.

Think about how successful the partnership between G-d and doctors has been. Average life span increased 60% from 1900 to 2000. Physicians got better and better at giving medical care. The Almighty granted them greater success.

Rather than getting discouraged, focus on what you can control. You decide what to do, why, and how hard to work at it. Refine your course of action. Learn about the only 5 steps you need to take to get a high-paying job. Direct all your energy toward improving each step you take. Always look for better ways to use your time and skills. When you get in the habit of finding another new way to pursue your goal, you’ll unlock hope whenever you need it.

Question – What job-hunting step can you improve on now?

You can leave a comment on this question or ask another question below

 

Every year beginning on Simchas Torah, the cycle of reading the Torah, the first five books of the Bible, ends and begins again. Each Sabbath a portion known as a sedra or parsha is read. It is named after the first significant word or two with which this weekly reading begins.

Do you have a question about the Old Testament? Ask it here and I will answer it in a future Parsha Nugget!

How to Be Enthusiastic But Not Fanatic

The Shrewd Way to Harness Your Passion

3 minutes to read

Parsha [Passage of Scripture] Nugget [Precious Idea] Yisro - Exodus 18:1-20:23

When I was a kid I once ate an entire bag of Mother’s Frosted Cookies. You know the circus animal cookies with pink and white coatings and multicolored sprinkles? I was a FANATIC for those cookies. But to this day the sight of them makes me sick to my stomach. Fortunately, Parshas Yisro showed me the way to curb my fanaticism:

“You will surely become weary, also you, also this people that is with you.” (Shemos/Exodus 18:18)

How to Be Enthusiastic But Not Fanatic

In this Sabbath’s parsha Moses reunites with his father-in-law. Yisro or Jethro, a Midianite priest, had heard about the wonders G-d performed for the Israelites. Jethro outlines a leadership plan that Moses adopts. His reward? He gets a parsha named after him - the Biblical equivalent of appearing on the cover of Rolling Stone Magazine.

After Jethro departs, the Israelites arrive at Mount Sinai. They accept the Torah and prepare themselves to receive a message from the Almighty. The entire people heard all Ten Commandments in one instant but couldn’t comprehend them. So G-d repeated them. But after the first two they were so overawed they begged Moses to intercede and teach them the other eight.

Distinguishing Passion from Obsession

Jethro meets Moses in the wilderness. He sees his son-in-law teaching and judging the Children of Israel all day long. Jethro becomes concerned Moses will wear himself out. Perhaps in your mind’s ear, you can hear the proverbial Yiddishe mama worrying about her boy’s health. But a Yiddishe father-in-law?

Moses was very idealistic. He went to extraordinary lengths to care for his people. I suppose if you must have an obsession, this one is better than frosted cookies. But at times he was fanatic. Nothing else seemed to matter.

Before the exodus, Moses neglected to circumcise his son. His wife saved his life by fulfilling this obligation for him. Later, his sister questions his withholding conjugal relations from his wife. It turns out he acted properly. But a word of explanation might have saved his sister from a painful bout of tzaraas.

Great though Moses was, he couldn't the need to share his burden. Along comes Jethro who believed in and worshiped G-d. He renounced a high position to pursue a life dedicated to serving the Almighty. Their values aligned. But Jethro had perspective. And like any devoted father, he worried about his daughter. If Moses didn’t ease up a bit, would he burn out? Where would that leave his wife and children?

Like what you're reading? Sign up for my blog updates and never miss a post. I'll send you a FREE gift as a thank you. Click here to subscribe.

Despite Moses’s greatness, his sons do not achieve anything of note. Would a less fanatic father have meant more successful sons?

Use Passion to Be Enthusiastic Not Fanatic

Life can get out of balance when you’re too focused on your goal. Don’t get me wrong. If you want a high paying job or a successful business you must pursue it. But that doesn’t mean you should give it all your attention. To make $100,000 a year, yet be overweight, divorced, and estranged from your children, is no victory.

Finding the balance point between enthusiastic pursuit of your goal and fanaticism will challenge you. It’s hard to see your life objectively. Ask your spouse or close friend to help you broaden your perspective.

But let’s be honest. Sometimes a spouse may sabotage your success. She may be uncomfortable with the risks you have to take. Or he may be afraid if you become successful you’ll end up leaving him behind.  A friend may feel the same way. And he could be jealous you’ll become more successful than him.

In spite of these pitfalls, seek the counsel of your spouse or close friend. If you feel their advice will hold you back, explore the motivation behind it. Are you blind to their genuine concerns? Or have they advised you out of fear or jealousy. Open, honest communication will improve your relationship and make your success more likely.

Moses and Jethro modeled productive interaction. Each had tremendous respect and love for the other. They communicated openly. Between them, Moses got a better plan for himself, his family, and the Israelites.

It’s easy to be a fanatic. Pursuing your goal can consume you. So you’ll meet your objective, but at what cost? Rather, check in with your spouse and trusted friend on a regular basis. Ask them to assess whether your passion is enthusiastic or fanatic. Let them help you keep your life in balance.

Question – Who provides you with the input to keep your life balanced?

You can leave a comment on this question or ask another question below

 

Every year beginning on Simchas Torah, the cycle of reading the Torah, the first five books of the Bible, ends and begins again. Each Sabbath a portion known as a sedra or parsha is read. It is named after the first significant word or two with which this weekly reading begins.

Do you have a question about the Old Testament? Ask it here and I will answer it in a future Parsha Nugget!

God Is Preparing You to Be Tough

Why Even Deep Love Can Be Painful

3 minutes to read

Parsha [Passage of Scripture] Nugget [Precious Idea] Beshalach - Exodus13:17-17:16

Johnny Cash’s music speaks to me like the Beatles do to most other baby boomers. Maybe because when I was growing up my father was pretty tough on me. Men of my dad’s generation didn’t explain their child-rearing goals with their sons. But one day I heard A Boy Named Sue. Cash put into words what my dad wanted me to be. Tough. Now I could see how much my father loved me. Of course, this was before I understood Parshas Beshalach:

“And Moses said to the people, do not fear, stand and see the salvation of G-d that He will do for you today.” (Shemos/Exodus 14:13)

God Is Preparing You to Be Tough

In this Sabbath’s parsha the Children of Israel leave Egypt. But once again Pharaoh changes his mind. He decides to chase them. At the last moment, G-d splits the Reed Sea (the usual translation of the Red Sea is incorrect). The Israelites walk between two walls of water on dry land. The Almighty drowns the Egyptians pursuing them. The Israelites sing the Song of the Sea thanking G-d for their deliverance.

On their journey to the Land of Israel, the Children of Israel complain of hunger and thirst. G-d sustains them with Manna from heaven and water from a rock.

G-d’s Love Doesn’t Always Feel Kind

The Israelites panicked when they got trapped between the Reed Sea and the Egyptian army. They complained that Moses brought them out of Egypt to die in the wilderness. Yet just days before, they witnessed the miraculous Exodus. How could they have lost faith so quickly?

After centuries of being slaves, it’s not surprising the Israelites were unprepared to defend themselves against their former masters. Though they vastly outnumbered them, from their youth they bore the yoke of Egypt’s oppression. Such feelings of inferiority prevented them from fighting.

G-d had freed them from physical slavery. Now each individual had to let go of the slavery mindset. The Almighty could have reset their emotions and spirit. But then the Israelites would not have learned how to grow on their own. Like any loving parent, the Almighty wanted to prepare His children to overcome the challenges of life.

Like what you're reading? Sign up for my blog updates and never miss a post. I'll send you a FREE gift as a thank you. Click here to subscribe.

G-d performed a miracle by splitting the sea. But only when Nachshon showed he was tough enough to move forward into the water up to his nose. Throughout their wandering in the wilderness, the Almighty brought physical miracles. But the Israelites had to show strengthened mindsets to benefit from them.

Get Tough Enough to Never Give Up

After making the same mistake for the umpteenth time, I find myself despairing. Defeats weighs on my spirit. So in a small way, I can appreciate how the Children of Israel must have felt. The part of me committed to giving up starts to get the upper hand.

Then I remember my dad. And I refuse to give in to my weakness. My father raised me to be tough. I find another way to overcome my challenge and reach my goal. Call it the umpteenth time plus one.

Pursuing a goal without positive results is discouraging. It’s worse when you don’t control the situation. Why doesn't G-d let you succeed? You focus on all the things that can go wrong. When the urge to quit hits you, it’s common to feel alone. Fear and weakness convince you to face all life's problems by yourself. That way they can enslave you with feelings of inferiority or excessive guilt.

Your task then is to view the elevated aspects of your character. Focus on your strengths. Internalize knowledge of your assets. Make them part of your purpose. Take time every morning to review them. From a powerful stance, in a strong voice, read your list of strong points. Embed the image of your unconquerable self into your being.

Then you’ll have unshakable resolve to triumph over your weak points and circumstances. You will succeed because you see yourself as a good, capable, resilient person.

You don’t need a name you detest to become tough. G-d loves you so much He’ll compel you to strengthen your resilience. And when you confront your problems with a stout heart, you might experience a miracle.

Question – How can you focus on your strengths but avoid becoming or being perceived as conceited?

You can leave a comment on this question or ask another question below

 

Every year beginning on Simchas Torah, the cycle of reading the Torah, the first five books of the Bible, ends and begins again. Each Sabbath a portion known as a sedra or parsha is read. It is named after the first significant word or two with which this weekly reading begins.

Do you have a question about the Old Testament? Ask it here and I will answer it in a future Parsha Nugget!

Get More Ideas Like These for Firing Up Your Life and a FREE Bonus!

Use:

  • The wisdom of Scripture
  • Battle-tested ideas from the military
  • Profitable business concepts

to design a better life for you and your family!

Plus, you'll get a FREE bonus, my 49 Day Challenge to Refine Your Character!